Monday, February 04, 2008

You Can't Put Your Arms Around a Memory

Lily's piece for the new STEPS mentions Borges's facetious taxonomy, a "certain Chinese encyclopedia" that divides animals into those that belong to the Emperor, embalmed ones, those that are trained, suckling pigs, mermaids, fabulous ones, stray dogs, those included in the present classification, those that tremble as if they were mad, innumerable ones, those drawn with a very fine camelhair brush, others, those that have just broken a flower vase and those that from a long way off look like flies.
I reproduce this here because it, along with my previous post, have made me think about a taxonomy of what this is actually useful for. In my first post of the reboot, I mentioned trying to focus on the portions of my day that don't involve sitting in my dark, silent apartment and staring off into the middle distance while listening to Frank Zappa's "Watermelon in Easter Hey," with the idea that my life might improve if I relentlessly try to think about positive things or highlight the positive things that have happened to me. As Sam Eliot once said, I didn't find it to be that, exactly... But at the very least, I'm actively doing what most people do to their college years, that is, nostalgically edit out all of the shitty parts.
In other news, I accidentally told my dad that I have feelings tonight. I had called home to say hey, and he picked up the phone. A few short moments later, my mom picked up another handset and she took over the conversation; I assumed that my dad had hung up. I talked for a little bit about feeling really depressed, and then moved on to other topics, before my dad spoke up to ask me a question and I basically shat my pants. I try not to trouble him with this stuff- this is probably the first time he's really heard that I'm depressed a lot, unless my Mom has told him (judging from the past, she has not).
Today was also the Super Bowl, and everybody knows what that means- another year where I don't see the Puppy Bowl because I live in the wrong damn country/don't have cable. Damn you, cable.

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