Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Decline of Western Civilization, Pt. 1



It's sort of bizarre watching stuff like that now, after Johnny Rotten has been on a reality TV show, and thinking that some people actually thought that Western Civilization was going to collapse and turn into a giant mosh pit because of punk music.



"The Burger & the King"- A documentary on Elvis Aaron Presley's interesting diet.



I absolutely love the voiceover narration in this copy of "Le Voyage Dans La Lune." The entire site has a fantastic selection of awesome videos. If you've never seen "M" or "Nosferatu" or "Faust" or "Japanese Spiderman," well, that's the place to see it.

So I went to my massage appointment at the Ovarium yesterday, which, as Jason X-12 once said, was like getting "beaten up, in the best way." I walked to the place about 15 minutes before and got slightly pissed at myself for never really exploring the area as much as I probably should- I really want to go to Les Cuisines du Tibet Libre, a Tibetan-themed veg/vegan pizza parlour. Anyway, I entered the spa place, which was positively aggressive about being as relaxing as possible right off the bat. After leaving my coat and boots in a little side room and slipping into a pair of foam sandals, I met Sebastian, who was to rub my entire body for an hour. He showed me to the small massage room, which boasted both a dreamcatcher and a Hopi drum/drumstick set. After asking a few questions, he left me alone to "prepare" myself.
I didn't actually know what this meant. I've never had a full body massage before (and, at this point, I still wasn't aware that that was what this was), and so I basically considered taking my shirt off, shrugged, and sat down to try some deep-breathing before someone started slowly punching me in the neck. Sebastian came back in, saw me fully dressed, said, "Oh, sorry!" and began to leave. I managed to stop him before he got out the door, and asked what, exactly, he wanted me to do here.
"Oh, ha!", he exclaimed before explaining, a bit awkwardly, that he needed me to "take off all your clothes, naked with your underwear on, and get on the table, underneath the towel."
So I did so, folding my clothes and leaving them on the Om chair. I can't say that I was immediately comfortable with the whole "being almost bareass naked" thing, but that was just more from embarassment than anything else. God, I hope Sebastian doesn't secretly think my back hair is disgusting, I thought as I covered up with the towel. The massage itself was freakin' amazing, though, and besides the initial "Wow, you're rubbing my inner thighs/feet" thing, was totally comfortable. I never really got the whole fear that some guys have of being massaged by a man, like they're going to be getting off on it or something. I'm betting that if you're a professional masseuse, you're probably getting as much sex as you really want on your own time.
Anyway, after an hour that I spent drifting in and out of semi-consciousness (damn whale sounds CD, why you gotta be so soothing?), Sebastian came to the part of the table where my head was and told me that "your journey...is over." He then left the room, right after inviting me to get dressed and spend some time in a small parlour, where I could have my choice of exotic teas and peruse their library of art books. I did so, reading through a really amazing copy of Ernst Haeckel's "Art Forms in Nature". I cannot emphasize how amazing Haeckel's prints are. Then I put on my outergarments, tossed my sandals in the "Dirty Sandals" bin and walked home, all loose and jiggly-like.
I also found out the other day that the guy I got my cat from specifically trained her to chew on wires, which explains why I've spent $200 on damn computer cords since I've gotten her.
P.S. "The Proposition" is well shot but kind of sucks (suffers from a really, really obvious case of Women in Refrigerator Syndrome), while "3:10 To Yuma" is just generally amazing, featuring the world's most badass sassy gay cowboy villain.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good post.